Recently a friend of mine, well, prospective shag really, told me that my constant talk of being ill and in pain was “a bit of a turn off”, others have also commented on the fact that I’m increasingly negative. Now while this upset me, and it did, a lot*, it also got me thinking.
I don’t want to turn men off, and I don’t want to turn people off in general. My one defence is at the moment I am constantly ill and in pain, along with being clinically depressed most folk would be a little negative. That doesn’t mean I have to be though.
When my prospective shag told me the above, he also just cancelled on me, ironically he wasn’t feeling too hot. So I decided every time something crap happened, like a cancelled date or whatever, I’m going to look at the situation and decide what’s positive about it.**
However lame my positive side is, that’s what I’m going to (try to) focus on. I’m not going to become one of these scary Ned Flanders types who is constantly happy about everything and makes you back away slowly from the cazed gleam in their eye. But I am going to make a change.
I do hate my job, and I do hate my lack of social life, but I’m trying to change both of these aspects of my life, and doing it with a slightly less pessimistic outlook will, I hope, bring change sooner and more smoothly than otherwise. And to be frank anything that gets in the way of me getting laid just aint good enough.
So thank you to my prospective shag for giving me a kick up the arse when I needed it, I think that evens out the karma for it making me cry.
Ha! y’all thought this would be a post about sex toys didn’t you!
*For those of you not familiar with my mental health issues, I have several manic and depressive episodes a day, guess what kind this one set off…
**Geekily my positive side to a cancelled date was more time to play WoW before the “love is in the air” festival finished so I could grab more special goodies.